And her vagina tasted EXACTLY like a slim jim
you drank 3/4s of your half gallon of vodka, made a fort out of the kitchen table, and actaually had sex in in it.
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
Tomorrow will not be complet unless someone eats me out. Just sayin
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
I am growing concerned with the number of people here in cowboy hats
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
I got arrested for "public intoxication". Fuckers threw me out of the bar into public... i mean shit they have thirsty Thursdays. And I get thrown out for self serve Sundays plus a citation.
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
Sorry about that whole "setting your deck on fire" thing.
Oh no. Not her. Her personality clashes with mine in ways that would make me wanna beat myself with a stick.
He tried to reenact Braveheart's freedom scream but got tackled by his drunk roommate who thought he was yelling that the handle he was holding up was free.
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
This guy on tinder just told me that he wanted to tie me up and asked me what I thought. I told him I wanted tacos
Randomize