First time i ever had an awkward silence during sex.
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
they came at us with fireworks while we were skinny dipping in her jacuzzi at 4 am...
She had the hiccups when she was giving me head. It was actually pretty awesome
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
WHY IS EVERY MAN IN THIS CITY GAY? IS IT SO BAD TO WANT TO BE TREATED LIKE A PIECE OF SHIT BY A REALLY HOT STRAIGHT MAN FOR A NIGHT?
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
New rule for Thursdays: no high gymnastics
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
I woke up in a lawn chair by the lake to some man revving his boat motor at me.
He's like a fucking cake pop, the greatest thing in the world while it lasts, but it never lasts for long enough
Costco cheesecake and whisky. A night made in heaven
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
No. I don't like you. I like your penis. Chin up. At least I like part of you.
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
Randomize
