Did you know they have alcohol AND weed delivery in Canada??? I'm not EVER coming home
Yea i'm supposed to have jury duty on monday. Hope they don't mind me still being drunk.
Na you can't get charged for public intoxication unless you're outside. I checked.
he's dressed up as spiderman, i don't understand why he's crying.
I woke up 25 minutes ago and have been high for 20. Impressive?
There's an official council for his ex boyfriends. They told me they 'look forward to the day I join them'.
My roommates just built a mini golf course upstairs while I was sleeping.
Please tell me you're not home alone watching Glitter.
Can you see in?
You wanna get laid? Be a female for once and stop bending nails to impress guys.
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
He still texted me and invited me over a day later so I guess I'm the lovable kind of psycho
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
He wants me to fart in his mouth and is offering me SOOOO much coke. I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. GIVE ME ADVICE.
duddde i wasn't even home last night and someone elses clothes are on my floor and there glow sticks everywhere?!
He showed up at my house drunk with a pizza and said he wanted to lazily finger me while I watched supernatural. Who was I to say no?
Randomize
