apparently they started giving me water shots and i couldnt tell the difference
you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
a slip n slide in 50degree weather was the 2nd dumbest thing i have ever done. the 1st was hitting the wooden fence i believed was supposed to "help us stop"
He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
If I am going to pay someone to make me puke, it's going to be the bartender.
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
Worse: texted mom-in-law by mistake that I sharted.
Worser: she offered to clean me up
Nothing like the soothing screaming of your neighbor getting boned while eating a pizza on the front porch.
The multiple male orgasm is a real thing. I've seen it. I've caused it. I called him a unicorn.
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
he BROKE his KNEE while we were getting it on, called 911 and the ambulance that showed up contained two paramedics, ONE WAS HIS FUCKING SISTER!!! HOW IS THIS MY LIFE?!?!?!
Poor life choices...?
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
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