its like his balls were made of silver and he was trying to polish the tarnish off
Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
A stripper just got mad at me for saying goddammit. She's in no position to lecture me on morality
Uggh answer your phone, you are the only one I know who'll be proud of what I woke up next to this morning .
make sure nobody uses the downstairs toilet. i like to have an unused toilet for the weekends. dont shit where you puke i always say.
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
You were riding my three year old's train yelling, 'I think I can, I think I can!!'
I thought I could.
Jumanji is 1000% better stoned while cooking breakfast.
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
You were throwing cups at people in the basement, yelling at them to get out of your swamp.
Would seriously like to slash his tires but then I feel like I'd have to deal with him longer.
i was so blazed last night that i kept imagining a talking eagle sitting next to me encouraging me to smoke more... i listened to it.
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
That’s all I need in life: vibrators, butt plugs, strawberry lube, and sour gummies
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