Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
I am a human short and spout . Here is my jager Herr is my redbull . When i get real drink i shout out. Tip me over and pour yeager out
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
I JUST HAD PHONE SEX. WHILE TAKING A BATH. FOR AN HOUR. EATING A PLATE OF BURRITOS. TOP THAT SHIT.
There is a reason for guards on beard trimmers I just clipped a wrinkle on my sack so much blood
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
My roommate said I banged on the wall and said, "this dude eats pussy like a champ."
sorry to break it to you, but he's definitely fucking that other girl now...
I wish I still at least had the bruises on my ass to remember him by.
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
You gotta start bringing a flask to work so you can get a head start
Possibly a very genius or very terrible idea...
it went well until I said "me" instead of "my" and he kept sexting me in character as a pirate
I am really drunk and also a zombie.
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
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