Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
Say something about gay babies.
no, i will not be your spotter when you masturbate with a noose around your neck
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
That gas station is used for only two things, picking up moonshine and getting murdered. Only two outcomes.
He wants me to hook up with his fiance while he watches. Text you later with how it goes.
Well, thats the first guy to go to jail because of my vagina
Post that event on your timeline
Get this. He's a red head and he works at country oven bakery. He will forever be known as the gingerbread man.
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
Can you stop being a bitch and just take some Kaluha shots with me bro?!?
She has also never texted me first which I think might be a tell-tale sign she wants me to die alone.
After he finished he laid there and told me how much work that just was. I looked at him and told him not to ruin a good thing by opening his mouth.
HEY I WILL KIDNAP THE FUCK OUT OF YOUR PET GOAT
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
he said he only had one rule...that he'd only go down on me 3x a day. so far this is turning into the best relationship ever.
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