dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
Can you still call it a wet dream if sandwiches were involved?
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
Kill yourself wednesday started off with a bang, and im pretty sure im still drunk from tequila tuesday.
Dude you couldnt even talk, you just kept hiccuping and slamming your head on the wall.
I peed on his girlfriend's loofah during our post-sex shower.
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
The best part about drinking boxed wine is you can blow up the bag and use it as a pillow
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
Are you in a good mood because I stuffed you with enchiladas, ice cream, penis, and cuddles last night?
i let a mormon finger me. i don't ever want to be that drunk again.
Hey, um, after thinking about it, I decided I really don't want to use applying olive oil to your ass for your fissure as part of foreplay because... well... really? Just read that again.
Randomize
