Dude i fell asleep inside of her
thats awesome
That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
tod's in jail
he was afraid of holiday checkpoints so we let him ride my mom's tandem bike home. by himself. at 4 am.
I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
I made her dinner: Beefaroni with grated parmesan cheese on top. Luckily she showed up drunk and gave me head, "For spending so much time preparing."
I finally got laid.. you said it wouldn't happen.
So i guess i slapped the girl sitting next to me leg and said "You know what they say, got fat legs...you gotta fat BOX"
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
Two hot shots of tequila for breakfast? Yeah today is gonna be a shit show
We should have a bouncer at the top of our stairs asking the guys we bring home for ID...
Yeah, I probably need some combination of electric shock, massive quantities of LSD, and enough couch time time to make Woody Allen say "Enough".
Randomize
