Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
Shut up. It sucks being the ugly friend, I would know, but someones gotta play the role
All I had with a note saying that my shoes are in the ceiling and good luck.
I woke up to the sound of gentle rain, only to realize I was laying under a urine trough in the men's restroom. Fuck you, bourbon. Fuck you.
nobody understands how my tooth became embedded in the ceiling last night.
We fucked in his mom's shower and all I could think about was being too old to be sneak banging while someone's mom was out of town and how much mildew was on the shower curtain. Fuck you, Adulthood.
Don't go to jail over some guy named Bunky
Does your drug dealer have a printer I can use??
I walked past his mum on the way out and she offered me toast in a napkin "for my travels". Being home from uni is weird.
Are you okay? You're not sitting at home on facebook. I'm worried about you.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
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