Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
Sometimes I wish I could peel his face off and use it to take all the money out of his account.
just woke up in a hotel room.. realizing its the hotel i work at.. lets see how this walk of shame turns out
I just puked in my fish tank. Helloooooo summer.
He's having sex with his gf again. Every thump of his bed against the wall is insulting to our one night stand.
Apparently you can talk a girl into leaving the bar and coming back to your tent, who knew?
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
I'm gonna give him birthday punches. On the dick. With my mouth.
She just asked to come over. She's either going to bring one of her dads guns and kill me or we're going to end up having insane lesbian sex.
For the record you're a very classy lady and your love for and mastery of strap-ons is amazing. I would gladly marry you and father your offspring
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
guess who smoked weed with their grandpa tonight. and no it wasn't me.
Randomize
