PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
Why did you take off so early
No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.
honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
Aparently his snake got loose in the middle of the night. Not a sex joke, he has a fucking snake
literally have a bruise on my forehead from being over the toilet all night.
truck drivers should not leave their trucks unlocked with cigarettes inside when we're drunk and walking around.
it's 10:36pm. Do you know where your penis should be?
She had me dip my balls in cake batter ice cream from cold stone and then tea bag her. Let's get weird just got a whole new meaning.
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
Masterbating to Tolstoy. You?
Beer Olympics must happen in honor of the legit Olympics.
HEY I WILL KIDNAP THE FUCK OUT OF YOUR PET GOAT
Randomize
