Ok im wearing a joe flacco jersey and full stick on unibrow and hardly anyone else dressed up omg
Omg suz!! take the unibrow off
No! im just getting hammered instead
You can't hide fat with big sunglasses.
Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
They said "my eyes made me look intoxicated" ......we harassed them all night and we called the cops and told them that the bouncer that kicked us out was selling meth in the club ...and then we went to wendys
I never said you were fat, just too fat for ME
Throw up on the ground, people dancing to loud Bollywood music, seats literally missing. Fuck I hate public transit
Last night must have been awesome, my dog still smells like vomit.
Woke up with string cheese braided into my hair- literally braided
Having him as a wingman is like telling the girl you already have aids
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
No fucking judgements. You know me. Chinese food vent sessions are safe places.
You're just gonna have to make the sacrifice man.
I'm trying to hide in the table.
I hooked up with a guy that had a beard last night felt like I was building a fucken log cabin
My walk of shame was four miles long and I had to stop for a water break. I am the picture of class.
it was her dad's 50th birthday kegger. Within the first 5 minutes I got punched in the ear from an off-duty cop and smoked a joint the size of my vibrator.
oh yeah, and she got boxed-out by said cop. Then her dad turned around and high-fived him for it
Randomize
