what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
He then proceeded to try to whisper up my nose...
I feel like I just need to fuck him after all his effort. like a "hey man good try" like those kids who get last place and still get a trophy.
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
Well the police had to intervene and I couldn't exactly feel my legs by the end of the night, but I'd say it was a successful Friday night.
Ice cream: Good. Fraternity: Good. Eating ice cream off a Skid Row bum's ass crack in order to get into a Fraternity: Homoerotic at best. I quit.
He's afraid of heights. How do I know, you ask? Blowjob on his roof.
I'm going to get like 25 drinks at their wedding and just leave them sitting around or give them to hobos.
Who the fuck superglued glowsticks to my arm.
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
I'm eating tortillas right now. Like not cooked tortillas. Someone is playing the guitar. Man with bandana.
If you sleep with him again I'll have you spayed
I CLEANED MY BATHROOM FOR YOU!! betrayal
he's smothering me... and not in the good, can you move your thigh off my face please?.. way
Randomize