were with a gay guy with a minnesota accent. think about how funny that sounds.
A female Wisconsin fan just headbutted the bouncer. Im deeply terrified and oddly aroused at the same time.
my affection for youporn is starting to get disturbing... i just thought about sending them a christmas card
I think I should become a real estate agent in th friend zone I know the place so well
The bartender just told me he would have me face down in his pillow by the end of the night. I hate when you make me go to gay clubs.
party gras won. party gras always wins.
I'm writing my will in case I die this week, it'll be saved on my computer under: little 500 death scenario
ERIN AND I ARE GETTING MATCHING VIBRATORS. I'M PEER PRESSURING YOU INTO JOINING THE CLUB. Besides we're the three best friends that anyone could have, you better not ruin that by being a pussy and not treating your pussy to awesomeness. That is all.
I was kind of torn between "Wow, this is awkward," and "Wow, my therapist is hung."
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
Just woke up. Will be over soon. DON'T LEAVE THE CHAMPAGNE UNSUPERVISED.
Well I finally got to say all the things I wanted to say. Including telling him he looks like a naked mole rat
dollar rum and cokes, see you on the dark side of infinity
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