So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
Ugh. my cast still smells like fermenting hot tub water and bad decisions.
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
Me and two guys that I made Eskimo bros all soberly slept together in my bed
I just gave her a sobriety test in the middle of the baking aisle.
And the results, officer?
She's fucked.
Dislocated my knee during sex, popped it back in and kept going. Then got simpathy chipotle out of it too.
I told her I was going to sleep early last night. I probably should not have sent that snapchat of us playing beer pong.
The last thing I remember is goading each other into a vodka-chugging competition.
And for today's main disappontment. I thought I saw a midget with fireworks get on the buss, alas it's a child with cleaning supplies
How do you get the "hangs out with drunk assholes" insurance
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
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