dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
I enjoy that i have a whole shelf of clothes that I've accumulated from random sex. You know the ones you get to make the morning after look less awkward like similar to an athletes trophy shelf
After you puked you called ur mom and told her you fucked on her bed, then u said "Have a good night mommy!" hung up and passed out on my couch
that would explain 17missed calls and 3 very angry voicemails from her
I just paid $5 for a shot of el toro and the bartender wasn't even hot. Rock bottom.
He passed out while I was riding him, and just when I was about to call it quits he opens his eyes and squeezes my boobs and goes Honk! Honk!
We started telling people we were married, and then we hooked up on a park bench
i was debating whether to load antoher bowl when i realized i was holding a sandwich in one hand and a cookie in the other. and laughing.
I am pretty damn sure that neither my body or his body is ready for how drunk I am getting tonight
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
I replaced his Viagra pills with sleeping pills.
Wait I'm all alone with a guy and his turtle
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
Oh yeah, you are a real peach except for shitting uncontrollably and bleeding out of your face.
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
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