oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
i know you like preteen girls so i'm gonna offer you some advice...dump a bucket of glitter on yourself and walk into the sunlight. they will come running.
Pretty sure I saw a dude across the room give this girl the international hand gesture for "I'm going to fist you later", she seemed ok with it.
I'm going to pre plan my black out tonight. I think I'll set a change of clothes out on my bed and unplug the oven.
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
Ran into my neighbor that's always crying. I wonder if she's like; "I ran into my neighbor who's always playing with her vibrator?"
I feel like Captain Morgan shit all over my hopes and dreams last night...
You're seeing with your vagina, not your eyes.
He blacked out and wouldnt drink anything unless he funneled it, so I made him funnel water
After you smoke one night. Just whisper in a barely audible voice, "Grey Poupon"
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
Oh, now I remember why I deleted your number. You're kind of a dick. Please delete mine.
Honestly cannot tell if I’m magical or really, really high.
Well I had to have sex with him so he would buy me plan b. The fact that I had sex with someone else last night who couldn't afford it is irrelevant.
Randomize
