he kept looking at my chin until i asked why, then he just said he was making sure his balls didnt leave a mark.
apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
on the bus. saw a kid get off at a red light, puke on the sidewalk, and get back on.
ohhh no, absolutely not. i am waaayyy too superstitious to have sex with the self-proclaimed "baby-maker" on father's day...
she tossed me in the back of the car and said "god gave u the gift of life and I wanna swallow it"
It's 9:30am and I've already blown three loads. Reason #101 I love 25 year old girls.
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
Jk. Anyone who everbeers with me is my type.
Bryan's allergic to that cheap detergent, so he's been naked for three days. But we're all used to it now, so the party is still on.
And then he said, "let's have sex and I'll send you home with enchiladas."
😂😂😂 what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
Was that you calling me at 4am asking to borrow a rubber ducky and a tampon?
there were rolls with just one bite out of each one leading to the bedroom. you were laying on the bed naked and yelled 'you did it you followed the bread crumbs!'
Randomize
