Having a random hookup so left but love u
I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
i just got the best bj of my life in the pastors office at church.. Youre right jesus really does love me.
I wana party with Kermit the frog, no wait. Fozzy the bear. He's probably a silly bitch when he's drunk.
he threw up all over himself while laying down.. it was like watching old faithful, but with noodles and vodka
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
Well, I'm at the grocery store wondering whether I exist or not.
i have a queen bed, a cherrywood bed frame, and gold sheets. how are you saying no to me right now?
Some dude just said my hair smells like his pillows
I'm pretty sure our sex is better than most foods and that says a lot too bc I really like food
Just sold our expired ticket for a free night of bowling to a drunk guy downtown for 50 bucks. Ill buy beer on my way home
I came so hard my entire leg seized. Her blowjob gave me a Charlie horse.
Randomize
