dude facebook disabled my account because im registered under a false identity. now in order to get it back, i have to prove that it's really my name. i sent them an email and had to sign it "Cordially, Lloyd Pancakes"
We should be called the Road Head Warriors
Awkward moment #23: reasuring mom that the bf and I aren't having sex as seamen is running down my leg...
Ya, found out why there were rat traps in my bed. Guess I pissed in Sams room so he went to the store and got them and put them on my bed and put tabasco in his humidifier and put it in my room
Picking up hoes with my dad is going to make it a little harder, but ay, if thats how he wants to bond after 23 years, Ill give it a shot
I just puked behind a tree outside work, then walked past my manager with puke in my hair. Man, I'm gonna miss this when I get a real job.
Time is so short and I miss you. (I just watched that commercial where the people all laugh and get older and die.)
All you had to say was "damn dude that looks fun, I miss ice fishing." But you sent a picture of poop. Classy
I kinda feel like I was hit by a Prius. Just glad it's not bus status.
He was late, on account of he accidentally went to the Al-Anon meeting across the hall, and it took him 30 minutes to realize he was in the wrong room.
I feel like I got hit by a truck. And I vaguely remember getting into an argument with a passive aggressive Ron Burgundy in a onesie- grown man, not a baby- about the pronunciation of New Orleans
For future reference, don't put tape on your nipples. Ouch.
I don't intentionally mean to ruin relationships for personal gain but. Yeah nah I totally do.
Are you in a position where you can bring me some nachos?
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
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