i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
I've never been 12-exclamation-point-excited for sex. That must have been good.
Got drunk. Then they sung "we didnt start the fire" to my other cousin who accidentally burnt down the house when she was younger.
You better drive. If I decide to let them talk me into a 3-way, I don't want you to be stranded.
you woke me up just to tell me that I was beautiful in every way possible. Then you proceeded to fall asleep with your mouth on my boob.
You know the party was great when the birthday girl gets arrested
Her vagina smelt so bad I lied and told her that I was married just so that she would leave.
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
It was like, once I started flashing you, I couldn't stop.
My boss doesn't know what jello shots are. I've lost faith in this company.
The selfie stick gets 5 stars bc it really added a fun element to my sex tape
Will Smith has a direct hotline to my emotions
I was drunk, but not drunk enough to forget I had some dude on his knees begging for forgiveness.
There's a guy in a plaid shirt running around asking everyone if they want to head butt him
Randomize
