I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
I've blown a few things in my day
its like the voldemort of pregnancies, we don't talk about it
you spent 5 minutes trying to open an empty PBR and kept saying "don't worry i'll get it i've been working out"
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
On the one year anniversary of me loosing my virginity... thousands of people will be taking their pants of on subways all around the world
It's like a tribute to you being a slut
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
Ive fucked up. im like a feral dog rabidly chasing an infrequent dream amidst a cataclysm of disaster
For sure. I'm slow cooking a 6 pound pork shoulder wrapped in bacon. If that doesn't scream "guys I'm going into culinary arts lets get drunk" I'm not sure what does.
I tried to order champagne at IHOP last night
I wrote a list of things I enjoy doing. So far it says "get high and go to museums."
90% sure I just sold adderall to my professor
100% proud
I'm not just straddling the line between love and hate, I'm dry humping the shit out of it
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
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