i just made my mom cry by blowing spit bubbles.
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
She bit a glass in half.
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
Our brains have an emergency blowjob override switch. You saw proof tonight.
Hey we need to step our game up. Dad has us beat; he stole a vending machine once.
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
I was so stoned last night I got into an argument with your voicemail message.
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
Looked like a bag of smashed assholes and smelt like a brewery - still got morning sex. Marriage rules sometimes!
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
I'm going to reward myself for having sex with coffee and a breakfast burrito.
I was pretty sure he wouldn't be into me after I fucked his brother, and then his best friend, and yet, here I am doing lines off his stomach
Only you would make Mario Party a contact sport.
And you owe me a new pair of switch controllers.
Randomize
