And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
she kept yelling 'call me bella'
Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
he woke me up at 3 am to ask me where my plunger, a towel, and staples were. i'm afraid to go into my bathroom.
Also, the wait staff kept prematurely clearing my Manhattans. Not sure if it was an oversight or a hint.
The investigator asked if we were sharing a pitcher of margaritas. I corrected him and explained that we each had our own.
Laying on my kitchen floor and the lights just got brighter... I just died or there was a power surge. Based on the amount of booze I drink both are possible.
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
From now on, you must never doubt my ability to go from drunken rambling lovesick girl to Stepford wife within the course of a few hours.
We exchanged snapchat usernames instead of numbers. Is that what America has come to?
I can already tell, the amount of fun I'm having right now is not nearly going to compensate for the amount of "let us never speak of this again" I'm gonna have tomorrow
Taylor Swift needs more songs about threesomes. I'm not sure she gets me anymore.
My vagina cried when he left. I think she's about to be at war with my self respect.
Randomize