There are traffic cones in the living room. One of them is yours.
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
My dermatologist just asked me, "what happened here?" referring to the bruising on my nipples. I told her I walked into a door. Thanks for that awkward moment.
You're barking up the wrong lesbian.
she wrote "need hug!" on a sticky note, put it on her back, and passed out on his bed. they're trying to figure out how she got into his room...
well when mom kept referring to my "black hole of a vagina" and how i devoured all the nuts at the party like i was a pro, i figured my stay was up.
He just asked if I would make his black snake moan. Dating basketball players is not worth the glory
i understand why you think this is a bad idea but its happening so buckle up an get your whiskey
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
he woke me up with all the stuff I had at his house in boxes i had to unwrap my own belongings and he said. Happy v-day its time to see ya day! Worst day ever
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
Remembering you have vodka in the freezer gives the same surge of happiness as finding 20 bucks in a coat pocket.
Randomize
