i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
i would rather give Shaq a handjob than take this accounting final
I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
He probably smells like baby powder and sexual identity crisis.
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
I think I'm still drunk and I think you were in my dream (sadly, it was not a sexual bill murray one).
I woke up at 6am to a knock and a naked guy at my window.
Let me be the 15% helpful, 85% useless as shit angel on your shoulder.
He just stays over and makes naked pancakes in the morning
Roommate charged out of his room in pajamas yelling "MAKE IT RAIN" and just threw $4,000 in fifties onto my head. My Friday night.
Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow
Randomize
