I'm a grown ass woman and I'm sitting in bed eating pizza at 4:30 a.m. BFD, right?
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
No I am not eating basil off your cock
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
And then I passed out in my towel and was woken up by my roommate introducing me to her trick for the night.
He needs a high five right to the fucking mouth. With a chair. Or an atomic bomb.
I'd rather be castrated by angry chipmunks Than live your life for 24 hours
I hear fucking Christmas music. I'm going to find fucking Santa and tell him to suck a dick and shut up for the next month
Yea, she's 42 I'm 23. Girls our age are terrible. All they need is a divorce and a bottle of wine
He ripped my sink off my bathroom wall and then threw up in it.
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
i don't know when underwear became an acceptable clothing choice for parties, but god help me i hope this isn't a passing trend.
All I could think about was how many vaginas had been on the toliet that I was pukin in
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
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