Let's play a little game called "Chill the Fuck Out" - you're our first contestant
you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
No, you dont understand, he literately fucked me into a new hairstyle, quite nice too.
im just glad that if you were going to have awkward hospital sex, you would want it with me
Hey just wanted to let you know my nose is broken and I have a fractured wrist. I told you it wasn't a slip and slide.
Dude I didn't think you'd do it. I mean come on, who puts a slip and slide on their driveway?
Sorry for screaming that you were an apple in spanish at the bar last night, that was the wine talking
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
How do I tell your little brother I lost my virginity wearing nothing but his socks?
Formal letter or email.
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
On the way home she told me she was in kindergarten when 9/11 happened
All I want is to get shitfaced and fuck random strangers is that really to much to ask?
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
Randomize
