Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
After 12 shots he decided to show us knife tricks. You can figure out how it ended
could you clean the juice and feathers off my bed I'm just not up for hangover cleaning.
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
When theres a zombie apocalypse, i will be the only fat survivor. I ate chef boyardi ravioli with part of a pen for a fork
YOU KNOW BRAZILIAN BOYS ARE MY WEAKNESS
You were drink-wine-from-the-bottle drunk trying to take everybody's blood pressures again.
You kidnapped her dog. I don't care that you and the dog are epic bros, that's just not cool. Return him.
I'm driving to his house to eat chicken and hopefully have an orgasm
I like to be the stable force in your otherwise chaotic existence.
The only words we could get out of him as he stared catatonically into space were "Everyone I know and love is dead"
People probably think I’m a fangirl bc I go to so many shows but it’s really bc I like fucking the tour manager
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