So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
I overheard a kid saying to his mom at Walmart: "Mommy.. should we buy cups for daddy's spit?"
my dog ran away and came back with a marajuana plant. what are you doing tonight?
sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
Give me a few hours to remember what being sober feels like.
The bartender just asked me if I owned stock in Jameson. I've been here for less than an hour and he's already judging me.
I gave up. I'm crying over my notes. Oh, ya know, just another drunk finals week
There are panties and mini bottles of Fireball in my purse. Except for the broken toe incident, I'd say last night was probably a success.
Volunteering at a homeless shelter a bum asked if he could lick me cause I still reeked of whiskey. Being a bumsickle=epic hangover
You know that episode of Spongebob where Patrick teaches Spongebob to be fancy? His dick was like that, only fancier.
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
The bouncer just called me magically delicious... apparently I'm a lucky charm. hollllleeeerrrr!
Randomize
