Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
my dad just secretly slid me a nugg in front of my mom. remind me why I moved away for college??
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
Just saw you drinking out of a flask on national tv. I've never been more proud of you
I offered you a bag but you said "I gotta break in the new carpet" and you puked all over the floor
You know the party's good when you say "Never have I ever caused an emergency landing" and someone drinks
Woke up and took my pants off only to realize that I was wearing my shirt from last night as my underwear
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
We're not ready for visitors right now.
wtf? who's we?
The Royal We: Me, My Vag, and I.
She stood up through my sunroof the entire drive home. screaming her ass off and singing free falling..
All right well I’m making her sugar cookies and sleeping with her husband tonight. Just another manic Monday
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
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