So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
well i just set every background of each phone in the verizon store to my face
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
my fraternity brothers just had an intervention for me. i either have a problem or am just on some next-level shit, im gonna go with door number 2
her roommates boyfriend drunkenly walked in on us banging and said yeeeeaaaaaahhhh and tried to high five me
You poured your drink on yourself and then said "it's not a party until I'm wet"
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
The best part about this city is obvious. Someone saw me crouching by a bar pissing in my leftover Panera bread bowl and they just winked.
I had so much drainage I couldn't moan properly. Fuck allergy season
Prepare for massive TMI but anyway long story short I have a Swiss flag band-aid across my balls.
What a patriot you are. How'd it happen?
And the view of you in reverse cowgirl is arguably the most spectacular view ever... And I've seen the Eiffle tower, the colosseum, mountains of Hawaii, Michaelangelo's David, and the Mona Goddamn Lisa. Just saying.
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
So about that you can bill me for the chair but it was David's idea to jump from the window sill into the washer with "clothing pillows of cloudiness" to land on to get ahold of him you have to phone his mother
I just talked to her she really hates you like a lot
He fingerfucked me in the hot tub and then we had sex in the wine cellar. See thats why I like partying with rich people
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