did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
It has to be really easy to get midgets drunk.
I watched her choke out a bouncer with the broken strap from her purse, I think shes the one.
Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know.
I go to a class slightly intoxicated and they bring in a baby. What a life.
You are not allowed to borrow my car ever again. It smells like a hobo orgy happened in my backseat with a hint of onion. What did you do.
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
My jeans are ripped and her glitter was all over me.. My walk of shame looked like I fucked a unicorn last night
Lets just say...I plan on being a bigger shitshow than Miley Cyrus at the VMA'S
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
Rum and your dick are involved. You're relying on the unreliable narrator.
Oh shit. My bra is undone and I'm pretty sure I peed on my sandal
I woke up with leftover chocolate syrup on my nipples. WTF happened last night??
Randomize
