MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
He's sitting on the floor holding his bracket and crying, literally crying... he just keeps saying "Kansas how could you?" over and over
Just so everyone's clear, it was already on fire when I got there.
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
And after peeing my pants waiting outside for him, i proceeded to drop down and roll in the nearest puddle to pretend like i just ate shit when he arrived
doctors was a success... no liver damage and I lost five pounds.. we're celebrating tonight you get the whiskey I'll get the burritos.
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
I had forgotten what new underwear feels like. It's as if angels descended from heaven for the sole purpose of supporting my junk.
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
how drunk are you?
Several
I've never met a penis that didn't think I was awesome.
I have decided that I would still fuck Harrison Ford even though he is old as fuck now. Do you think it would kill him?
Most likely. But I bet he'd do a bang up job of it before he died.
He absolutely would.
Randomize
