A good Q tip ear swabbing is better than bad sex.
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
just learned how to wash a penis. thank you nursing school for getting me the most action i've had in months.
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
Sorority life is like alcoholic girl scouts, plus douchebags in polos.
she's sniffed three people's necks on the bus to see who the good smell was coming from...
she's gonna get diseases
is it weird that I didn't think he was hot last night when I was making out with him but right now I'm Facebook stalking him and think he's really attractive??
your beer goggles are on backwards.
We dared each other to drink Arbor Mist, and I waterboarded someone with tequila.
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
Went out with the family last night and some 40 yr old lady wanted to take me home. My mom was not happy with me
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
Well Jon got a DUI sleeping in the back seat so I thought the trunk was safer. BUT WHO CARES WHY JUSE PLEASE COME LET ME OUT!
I visited the library for the first time in my college career tonight and I got laid. I think I'm gonna come back...
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