They have to be talking about me. I never heard that statement until I was born.
The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
I sat in the mc D drive thru and refused to move till the chick gave me her number
They just kept handing me shots and saying welcome to college
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
The picture that pops up when I call her phone is a picture of my nipple. Just so you're forewarned.
I just moved 6 traffic cones blocking a row of traffic. I got applause.
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
Going through my bras is like traveling back in time through my past hookups and relationships....
For real, I've been ditched by my boyfriend twice today alone. I fucking shaved for this guy.
Somewhere out there, Gloria Steinem just started to cry.
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms.
Randomize
