Only a mothe r could love this liver
I gave my ex the dutch oven last night. How was your night?
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
You did not just play the dead husband card again.
New plan, instead of sleeping with her, I'm just going to use her to sleep with the entire sorority.
I feel so grown up. I just went to home depot to buy actual home improvement supplies instead of stuff to make a bong with.
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
We are going to be Siegfried and Roy for Halloween and you are going to be the tiger.
Maybe your new years resolution should be not to fuck in Sears bathroom anymore.
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
We were having sex and my nose just started pouring blood. He reached down to the floor, grabbed a sock and held it to my nose. He just kept pounding away like nothing was happening.
With everyone putting up pictures of their moms on Facebook it's time to go single MILF hunting.
What are the chances I get my period 2 weeks early just as welcome week starts. My uterus is conspiring with my dead catholic grandma
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
I threw my shoes out of frustration and walked home barefoot... can you help me find my shoes in the morning
Randomize