I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
I feel like if your cat could talk she would call me a cunt.
I've blown a few things in my day
I had to brake up with him.
In my experience drinking helps.
You dont want to know why?
Not really. I want to drink.
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
Mitt romney looks like a fantastic lover (full disclorsure: im 76% vodka right now)
I totally left my shirt at your house. Also I think I high fived your cactus last night
I just found glitter from our Father's Day party on my balls this morning.
DAD WTF
you weren't there so I had to flirt with him on your behalf
Also I just had a pointless meeting and the only thing I accomplished were my kegals
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
a day off where I don’t get laid would be worthless
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
Randomize
