dude. I'm so drunk.
pete, this is bryce's mom
I can't wait to have my cock in your ass
pete, this is still bryce's mom
im just going to superglue mistletoe to my forehead and see what happens
Just saw a girl trying to crack an egg with her butt cheeks. I think I know what we're doing thursday night.
sperm doesn't mix with malibu too well
It's safe to say that bucket of tequila night can NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
And if I could both stabilize myself *and* pick things up with my penis... Well, I wouldn't be on the fire dept...
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
I just remembered I did the whole byebyebye dance at the bar
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
One of the finest moments in my life was when I was puking in between my legs as I was shitting, and thought to myself "hmm this shall be called shomiting."
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
soo... how was my night?
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