i keep walking around campus wondering if anyone is as stoned as i am
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
Forgot my sound was off and didnt even realize it until halfway through because I thought I could hear it. I think high me just narrated half a clip of adventure time
Omg yes! I just found a random muffin! Don't question it. Just praise the miracle.
You what they say. One dick in the hand is better than two in the bush
Seriously just told the plant the cheese Pringles are mine.
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
Have you forgotten that this whole sexy cop role play started with a comment about my mom?
He KNOWS ALL THE WORDS TO "JESUS IS MY FRIEND", I swear if he even tries to pull shit with me I'm becoming an actual nun.
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
I got all the way to work before I realized there were Trojans in my bra.
You know why I love being a regular at this bar? It's because at a certain point last call is only a suggestion.
He told you he loved you. Then you wanted to find a chainsaw to cut his dick off.
My manager gave me an envelope with money in it before he had vacation, and when I asked what it was for, he said it will be his bail money.
Randomize
