she really just asked how mermaids reproduce.
I feel so much closer to you now that I heard your poop splash into the toilet.
...and the foreplay consisted of me threatening to cut off his hand if he didn't remove it from my back.
Hey man, sorry I chased you around the house with a small table.
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
Really? Uh ohh sounds like a double date with extra stripper funnnn
You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
drunk caitlyn doesn't know how to work gmail. so know an email has been sent to the entire campus with a picture of me naked eating a bagel attached.
I want to put in my resignation as an adult. From now on I will be spending my time drinking beer and skiing.
The bump on my forehead, i think, was from falling asleep at front door, on my knees, slumped over. But we played good music so what?
MY HAND WILL BE UP HIS ASS IF HE DOES NOT APOLOGIZE FOR WHAT HE DID. IT WON'T BE THE GOOD-FEELING KIND OF "HAND-UP-ASS" EITHER.
I gave her two orgasms and then we laid there and she ate jelly beans out of my belly button...that girls a keeper
so he'll eat food out of a dumpster but he won't lick your ass?
Randomize
