Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
I just found her phone in the quesadilla maker...
the only reason you beat me in fntsy this week is bc you wouldnt bail me outa jail in time to set my roster you dick
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
Now accepting hypotheses about how i managed to get a bruise between my boobs....
Her grandmother had a handicap stair lift. I just put her drunk ass on it and let her ride it up. Thank God for broken hips.
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
I can't finger myself when I'm all distracted about whether or not your family is going to like me
I can't go to the bars anymore. She wanted to see me again and I drunkenly told her I was moving today. If she spots me I'm fucked.
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
I saw some guy masturbating in the Burger King parking lot and I’m just fucking done
Sober sex is weird like I didn't expect this when I got clean
Randomize
