I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
I hate thxgiving break now because that totally means I'm not able to have sex for a week.
everytime she opens her mouth i wish that i was deaf
he then proceeded to tear down my curtains, wrap them around his waist, and use the rod as his "rod"... you tell me how drunk he is...
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
He was puking up tons. He aimed his face inside his coat. Not a drop in my car. Then he thanked me for the ride.
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
How drunk do you think I'll be by the time I get home?
I just watched you drink a whole glass of wine through a Twizzler. Pretty drunk.
There are no winners in a lube eating competition.
I don't trust his life but I trust his penis.
I found a briefcase foll of fireworks in my old bedroom...that's an appropriate thing to bring to a wedding, right?
Look man if you're looking for a voice of reason, you're talking to the wrong woman.
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
Randomize
