are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
I really like you and I'm tired of just hooking up. I want you be my boyfriend.
Uhh, I'm not breaking up with my girlfriend to be with you.
Wow so 15 missed calls, a vm AND a text saying come downstairs? ...And where is downstairs? Explain.
we all took turns holding you up and pretending that you were simba and that we were presenting you to the jungle
My girlfriend is studying for the MCAT by watching The Magic Schoolbus. There go my dreams of being a househusband.
he doesn't even text me anymore.. he just facebook chats me a shark emoticon which has turned into code for 'be naked at my house in 15 mins'
i feel we're the only people who'd use nyquil sexually
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
Wasn't his fault he kicked a hole in the wall, they should have never tried to give him a bath after tequila.
I brought ur friend Scotty home... He started rubbing my crotch then fell down and passed out in front of the microwave
So I just realized I have three bananas, seven condoms, three lube packets, three tampons, and a shot glass in my bag but no pen #modelstudent
You continued to run around saying "free the nipple" while "taste testing" every liquor on the premises.
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
my only goal for the semester is never go to my wednesday class sober
Someone made a mask out of a crown royal bag. Can't decide if tacky or awesome.
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