He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
threw up in a bar last night and got laid on an air mattress. my bucket list just got a lot shorter
Woke up with my foot jammed into a VCR
I AM SUCH A BETTER PERSON ON DRUGS
explain the broken jalepenos in my underwear drawer?
How am I?!! The turkey is dry as shit, I'm watching football in low def and there's no beer b/c everyone is in aa. Fuck giving thanks.
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
Everything smells like blood and olive oil.
All I am going to say is this: I woke up with lots of bruises on my knees from running around on all fours being a 'dinosaur'. Either girls night in went terribly wrong or terribly right.
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
My mom and my boss just had a discussion on FB about the sexual habits of old people. The magic of the Internet.
So we were fooling around last night and suddenly Like A Virgin popped up on his itunes
OMG haha What did he say?
He told me that if I laughed, I would have to leave.
So many questions so I’ll prioritize. How did I survive last night?
Randomize
