So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
Hey babe, chan wants you to stop texting her about the size of TJ's dick. please.
I had a dream once that juice was flowing out of my kitchen faucet
i told the bartender last night that if the palace saloon made a calendar he would be every month.
I wonder what it would be like to go to the dry cleaners and not have to inform them that all my clothes are stained with booze.
why didn't you tell me his penis tasted like oreos?
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
I just puked so hard I pissed myself. Outta my ass. I just won hangover of the century.
That sad moment when even your drug dealer lands a summer internship and you don't...
I'm just trying to absorb as much of the fluids from the carpet as I can.
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
I'm on a walk of shame carrying YOUR pants. You owe me.
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
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