I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
She told me that she faked her orgasm. Does she think I care??
no seriously, she's legit pissed i'm late to lunch because i was watching full house. there's obviously no future here.
They were going around the house breaking things and screaming "Not my house!"
Then, he just started shoving orange pieces in my mouth as a chaser
I barely remember the girls that I got pregnant, you think I'm gunna remember the ones that played handball
Oh my god. You have got to get off that breast feeding support group. They're on to you, dude.
You know what's even more awkward then buying plan b from someone who is a member at the gym you work at... When they come in after that day and have that look of recognition
Just figured out my hair is long enough to tie my wrists together. . .get over here NOW!
HE ASKED IF I HAD SIBLINGS WHEN I ASKED HIM TO LICK MY ASSHOLE
And then before we had sex he was quoting space jam to me
The cat is stealing cigarettes and my vagina cures blindness. How's your night?
I'm taking pictures of my asshole to send to my boss. This is not what I had in mind the day after thanksgiving.
Dude she is fucking shit up. Her baby would be proud
It's difficult when the romantic and the hedonist in me are fighting. I want him to respect me and hopefully pursue an actual relationship, but then I remember he fucks like a GOD and loves my kink. Oh, life's hard.
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