Today at work while talking to my co-worker we both realized at the same time that last year I had a one night stand with his roommate and he was in the living room drinking coffee when I did the walk of shame. YAY.
Breakfast is bomb, yo. McDonald's before ten thirty is like Katie Holmes before Tom Cruise.
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
The problem with having a roommate is that you are forced to answer the age old question "Are you okay?"
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
His Australian accent during sex made me think I was in an Outback Steakhouse commercial
My aunt just dropped me off at the bar, handed me $50 and told me she'd pick me up later if I needed her to. I should've gotten my license suspended a long ass time ago lol
He took a shot of vodka and AND ATE ME OUT AS A CHASER. YESSS. I AM IN LOVE.
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
So I had this brilliant idea that I would sleep in all sorts of sweatpants and sweatshirts... Apparently I thought I could "sweat" off the drunk in my sleep and that it would make me feel better when I woke up
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