we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
I hope whoever gets these locks of love doesn't have a drug test anytime soon
There's a girl sitting in front of me making a PowerPoint on Jack Bauer.
Me and a lesbian played "may the best man win" over a bi chick tonight... I lost, still fun though
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
Found a dirty envelope on my seat w ur name and $122.50 written on the front. Nothing inside but what looks like dirty pine needles
Guess who just sucked off 1/5 of one direction?
At tuba camp, the pickings are slim. It's like being the tallest midget.
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
He wore a t-shirt that had an arrow pointing to his crotch and "DO IT FOR THE VINE" on it.
At least he's honest about how long he'll last.
I think my moral compass just broke
You cannot ask her to resend the picture of her genital tattoo to you just so you can show your room mate. it is time to end your relationship with the Captain.
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
I don't even remember what dignity looks like anymore. I JUST WANTED TO ROAST SOME POTATOES
was having sex but got distracted... he instragramed a pic of his crotch
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