Not a fireman, but good enough for last night.
She was Ugg boots AND a Bumpit. Of course I didn't sleep with her.
You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
Apparently I mistakenly called the hair club for men at 3am... they called me back this morning.
When I woke up I had three missed calls from the name 'dream krystals'.... If I remember correctly she was the lady at the drive thru at Krystals and her name was Dream.. She wanted to come to the strip club with us... Do you remember?
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
Nothing tops off the night like giving emotional and spiritual guidance to a 70 year old transvestite.
Geez don't go to a bar for a few days and everyone freaks out.
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
He just said "I know you want my cock" and I said nah. I want food bro
CURRENTLY PLAYING FLIP CUP WITH A WORLD SERIES CHAMPION
I don't even remember what dignity looks like anymore. I JUST WANTED TO ROAST SOME POTATOES
Randomize