Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
if i could have babies with my dog i totally would cause i know thay would be fucking hott babies.
I have glitter on my penis. Do you know anything about this?
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
just found $310, wrapped in a rubber band, at the bottom of my sock drawer with a note attached stating, "Make it rain".
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
Are you sighing at your phone and judging me right now?
I'm gonna fingerblast you when you get off work. Get ready.
First time at a gay bar. I found a surrogate AND sperm donor! The surrogate is straight, so it evens out.
I drank, I fought, I made my ancestors proud.
And then someone hit me with a pool cue
I thought I was heading girls talk. It was the toilet. Like put my ear to it
I have a terrible feeling that I made out with a fraternity last night
i just teared up watching channing tatum in drag emerge from the fog on lip sync battle. it's gotta be PMS. either that or something is realllllly wrong with me.
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
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