I basing my decision on whether or not to date someone on whether I could imagine having sex with them sober
my grandma was just praying before dinner, and before she could finish my gpa lifted his glass and said 'and here's to avatar!'
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
I don't know who he was, where he came from, or where he went, but he just handed me a bowl of mac and cheese and left. It was good too.
It's called "lets see how many European capitals we can do the walk of shame through in one year"
I just hit myself in the face while taking off my shirt. I could never be a stripper.
No gay bar. My eyemake up looks like sex and Im using these dick daggers of mine tonight.
No she probably looked into my aura and saw that my penis would ruin her.
Can I get that on a shirt
Eight drinks in. Subject is fondling chips before eating them. Intoxicated texting has expanded from best friend to random guy I met in FBLA.
I'm dressed in all sequins still at 9:30 in the morning and the worst part is that I actually still fit in in Vegas
I thought 5 times was beyond my capabilities but her tongue was like a penis defibrillator. Clear!
Having sex with him is like eating mayo. Don't think about it, just do it. It's worth it.
I give out orgasms like candy and ride a motorcycle...how is that not appealing
Just waxed 95% of the hair off my vag. If he doesn't enjoy this tonight, you will, whether you like it or not.
There are only a few things more freaky than wandering around a zoo drunk.
Randomize
