Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
thus making me awesome and them whores
No, that was before the police came, but after the hooker.
just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
I just watched her pee in a trashcan, im still probably going to fuck her, what does that say about my standards
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
the game I always play with drunk me is can-you-button-and-unbutton things? If the answer is no, go home. Usually it's his pants
You are a booty call, not a friend.
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
Is it bad that I'm tracking my period with Instagram pictures?
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
I'll admit it. It was a bad idea to sneak a fart out while she was taking a nap. Can you bring me a pair of underwear from my dresser. Preferably the one with the walruses in party hats one.
She was about to leave with you until you started singing "You Hoes Ain't Loyal" in her face
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
Dennis picked up a 50 year old woman. Then he and Dan got in a fight and jumped out of the limo. No one knows what happened to them.
Randomize
